it's because they believe they were meant for something. usually something grander than their present circumstance. some other satisfaction exists out there different from the kind they feel at present. and with this natural pull for more, so instinctive in our human selves, we reach higher. not to capture a title necessarily or a status even, but a genuine place of fulfillment, a plateau by which one may observe their successes, their past struggles, their abandoned burdens - all shed in pursuit of the dream.
the accomplishment of the dream is never dissatisfying. unless you pursued someone else's.
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I describe myself, these days at least, as a wanderer, a "free spirit" some have said. i am simple when it comes to earthly pleasures, and deeply complex in the aesthetic realm. i find little use in fancy clothes, brand new cars, exquisitely made jewelry, and an expensively furbished flat. the American dream of reaching this status includes going to college, going to graduate school directly after, snagging a highly paid, highly flexible career, getting married in style, buying a fine house in the suburbs - not too far from the city - getting a new SUV and mid-sized sedan (no minivans allowed), having 2 or 3 kids so as not to scare the neighbors, putting them through school, extracurricular activities, college, buying them cars, houses, weddings, divorces, going on expensive holidays together, retiring, traveling, and giving huge birthday checks and tuition checks to the grandbabies.
Besides doing this, people die in the process and forget they had dreams and adventures planned for themselves. things not on the map. people are stifled and suffocate in their dry-cleaned suits and home entertainment theaters.
something dies.
maybe people aren't even growing ambitions in their kids these days, so it never even gets a chance to die because it never even gets a chance to breathe. people don't mind dying because they think it's living.
affairs. mid-life crises. emotional isolation. workaholics. no personality house wives bored out of their damn minds. it all starts out looking like the American dream, but pretty soon about half of them dissolve into this, statistically speaking, and the other half slink along hiding secrets and lies, afraid of looking glasses because they can't look past someone else's ideal for their own life.
maybe it's not that aesthetically complex. i just want people to start breathing again.
